Or, How To Take Advantage Of An Unseasonably Warm Winter During A Three Day Weekend.
Step 1: Go to a grocery store with your cousin late at night and buy food for your hike the next day. Impulse purchases are highly encouraged. Do not forget the salami.
Step 2: Drive friend and cousin to Muir Woods early the next morning. You will beat the tourists and the inevitable parking clusterfuck. This is worth a few less hours of sleep.
Start the hike, and laugh/make fun of the women wearing high-heeled boots and makeup. You are better than them.
Step 3: Take the Lost Trail to the Panorama Trail, to the Tourist Club, to the Dipsea Trail. Trail names are the best.
Step 4: Stop often to view the Pacific Ocean from the Panorama trail. This makes an excellent excuse for stopping because you need to catch your breath after climbing roughly 3,497 stairs.
Best part was the salami.